Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Not a Memory Lane... (personal)

I think I expect too much from myself.
You may all say yes, you have said that before. But today I felt the true effects of over-working myself and that just turned into Stress, and backlashed as hermit-bella.
I wanted to lay on my couch and eat my chilli that I made from scratch. I love baby corns in chilli - that was random.
But I had a cranky baby and a messy house. Yes, folded laundry sitting on the stairs, christmas decorations piled on the dinning room table waiting for their boxes, dog haired rug that needed a vaccum, and please, let's NOT talk about my kitchen. On top of that, ONE WORD: Emails. Love them. Love people. But holy, have I ever talked/wrote so many emails to people in my life? No.
I'm seriously contemplating getting into Horse Sport Photography, maybe on the side?
I have Bronson to work and organize and pull my hair out, all the while loving it - isn't that weird?
I totally over-stress. One thing goes out of line and my little perfection of a circle is crushed like canned tomatoes (yea - I made that up).
Maybe I can learn to not have a perfection circle?
Maybe I could look at a setback as a good thing?
Me accepting small failures?
No - to me. Failure does not make money, nor does it keep my circle perfect.
So I take a small failure and propel it into more drive to succeed.
And you're all sitting there calling me crazy.
I'm lying down right now, on the couch, maybe need to go to bed.
Maybe I'll check my email again, or try to leave it alone for a whole day tomorrow, not tweet, not check facebook - in a perfect world.
Social Networking is keeping both Bronson & Bella Johnson going right now. Internet is an amazing thing. Facebook, man I wudda loved a peice of that cake. Twitter is just obessive. Blogging is for feelings and truths, and I hope you all see that I'm not some perfect person behind a computer, a lens, a facebook account. I'm just a person. With a life. With Stress. And yes, missing Memory Lane Monday.... appolgies.

Thanks Guys.

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